Hi, my name is Ms.K, and I am a serial do-er. It’s taken me a while to admit this to myself, but I can’t seem to sit still without feeling the need to do something productive, whether it’s on my laptop or around the house. I consider sitting with a book to read almost like a waste of time. But if I’m listening to an audiobook while I’m cooking or running a chore, it’s like a double bonus. As I write that, I do feel a twinge of sadness for myself! That is not the person I want to be.
And here’s the kicker: I’ve even considered going back to work early while I’m on leave. I know, I know. Who does that? Apparently, I do. It sounds crazy. But when you’re wired like me, it’s hard to switch off the need to be productive. It’s like I can’t handle not having something to do, and that’s a problem for someone who wants to retire early, I should think!
As you would know, we’ve been working on FIRE for years now and we constantly are dreaming about the day when we can spend our days doing what we want. Mr.C seems quite sorted, he has zero issues and can’t relate to my personal struggle. I, on the other hand, have started to wonder if Early Retirement is even possible for someone like me. Will I ever be able to truly relax and enjoy my downtime, or will I always be thinking about what I should be doing next?
According to experts, constantly feeling the need to be productive can be a sign of addiction to work or productivity, which can have negative consequences on mental and physical health, as well as relationships. This addiction is often driven by underlying fears or anxieties, such as fear of failure or fear of not being good enough.
Ok, outlook isn’t great and sounds like I need a therapist? An addiction, is an addiction, right? But let’s try to solve it before dishing out hundreds on professional help! It boils down to this, if I can’t resist the urge to stay productive, how will I ever learn to embrace a slower pace of life? It’s something that I need to work on if I want to truly enjoy the fruits of early retirement.
I think part of the solution is to spend some time carving out what early retirement might look like for me. Maybe I need to redefine what I consider productive and figure out what activities bring me joy and fulfillment beyond just ticking things off my to-do list. Did I just give myself a list of things to do, to stop doing so much??? Oh, the irony!
Perhaps I need to stop adding things like “pet the dog” or “breathe” to my list just so I can cross something off. Kidding!!!! But I do add tasks I have completed just for the joy of ticking things off. Yep, I’m clearly a work-in-progress. This is going to be a bit of a journey, no doubt.
So yes, the prospect of early retirement is actually daunting to a serial do-er like me. I always kinda knew it, but I was in absolute denial and it’s the first I’ve admitted to it. I think there’s a lot of people out there who might feel the same, care to comment below? Do you still feel the same, how did you move past it or how are you currently working on it?
